How should i start..
Hmm okae ..
Alright, i just want you to know, that its agony when you hide answers from me
Suresure i can wait, But its still going to be hard on me.
I really want to know what your true feelings are, what truly goes on inside your head, what you are really thinking behind those beautiful eyes.
It is really, with all honesty, very difficult for me to go on like this =(
Thinking of what we've been through,
The smiles and the tears,
It just makes me stop and wonder,
Was it worth it?
Let me just ponder,
and weigh the options.
Thinking of you,has used much of my time.
However, it makes my heart grow fonder of you.
Talking to you,has used up my mental strength.
However, it is never a chore as your laugh makes me smile.
I have always been sure,
Of what my feelings were.
That is why,
My question to you,
Do you harbour any feelings for me at all ?
I hope that helps to change your mind.ily.
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Untitled
bad mood
GIVE ME A STRAIGHT ANSWER ! =(
YOUR MAKING ME WAIT, FOR BARELY NO REASON AT ALL
YOU BARELY KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME.
Then again, i know i brought this upon myself .
Then again, i will feel better if i knew answer instead of making me hopeful
Then again, if you said no i'll be sad
Then again, if you suddenly say yes ?
Then again, thats impossible
Then again, anything is possible
Then again, this is different
Then again, The answer is making me wait moar
Then again, i can barely wait another second
Then again, its never a chore to wait for you
Then again, you still make me frustrated with your silences and "dunno"s
I am sorry i just have to voice out my internal conflicts going on about this issue.
ARGH !!
Soccer
Heyyooo
~ I'm really fatigued right now hahas.
ytd had cca.. and, as usual, almost fell asleep.
one good thing though, im getting better at my parts.
~at night, at around 7, i made my way to my cousin house
Then lazed there till 9 when we started making our way to the FICO sports hub at jurong west ther
Met with others there then paid the rent etcetc
THEN WE STARTED PLAYING !!!!!! wooo~
Soccer straight for 2-3 hours
We started playing at 10 ended around 1+ ??
dunno hahas but i rmb going back to my cuzzin house (AZRUL) and slping at around 2
So far, its been fun hahas, but i expect a better climax of events soon ;D
HOPEFULLY, 2moro, i can watch the Singapore Lions take on Vietnam for their Semi-Final. I HOPE dat there will still be tickets ther.. and i also HOPE that the Lions won't dissappoint us again with that EMBARRASING show during their First Leg game -_-
GOGOGO LIONS FTW !!
~WooWOOOo Bored .
w000000OOOOO
Boring day todae ?? i dun think so
Woke up .. bathe.. on com .. bah thats wad i do everyday till i gorrt a call frm chee eng ;D yayyy badminton.
Arrived at CC around 2:45 ? then solid badminton for the next 3 hours.
Played alot alot .. Sweat alotalot
but only got a few ppl arhs, namely, WEITING FELICIA ZICHONG KOKCHUAN CHEEENG. had a great fun time ;D
then after 3 hours, when weiting,zichong,and kokchuan go home liaos,, some uncle, came. hes dam nice lols. me feli and cheeeng playing 2v1 i alone. den uncle go my side play. wa heck i tink he can own us 3 together den somemore i on his side so i quite bored de .. he dam pro. Chee eng try his best .. i could see lols, he at his best hor, the uncle stil lthere smiling and relaxed wth!!!!
whoa like dam ... hahas ..
Well today one of the rareRareRare fun day of the hols. .
~Hope to have more days like these ;D
Relinks/links
for all viewers of my blog (if i have any)
I will start to relink or link starting today. So just tag yeahhs ?? ;D
~just fyi, my latest relink is "MARISSA" and i will not relink any before "XIAOHUII" so just tag again yeahhs ?!?! ;D
Reality Check
During these holidays, i have really thought i was on top of the world. Ohohoh how dumb i was. hmms, that top of the world feeling has changed. REALLY changed. now im feeling that i cant accomplish anything, and it would be better if i jus stood aside and did nothing.
1) Personal
I just don't feel comfortable, i seriously don't know why. is it because of what im feeling ? right now i cant tell. to say its sadness is an overstatement. to say its happy, is dumb >< i guess u can call it confused, cos i dun seem to have a purpose i life during these long hols.
2) Family
I declare my family unstable. My mother hates my step grandmother and vice versa.
my dad is the one trying to make peace but he cant much while i am caught in the crossfire. i guess its ur classic case of family instability at home, but don't worry i won't grow up to be a gangster,
3) My love life? = non-existent
I guess for my personality, its difficult for me to find anyone. i thought i found one that dae, only to have been thrown back to reality when it ended. don't think im arrogant saying that im spoilt for choice, what i mean is, that its hard for anyone to ever take a second look at me. im the person u can easily miss in a crowd, insignificant and boring.
4) Friends ?
So far, this is the group i can rely and fall back on. i have great friends who always lend me a listening ear and i can pour my feelings out to. yeah i know it sounds gay, but im not -_- guys hav feelings too. well if u think my feeligns are complicated, imaagine how worse it would be if it was a girl's feelings
hahas
wells after this post, i hope that none of you reading would think that im emo. its just one of those days where i dun feel like myself. Those odd days when things don't go ur way. It kinda makes me sad sometimes but what the heck thats life. and please don not think im lame, this is a blog, therefore i hav ethe right to express how i feel.
In summary
I am not Gay
I am not Emo
I won't grow up to be a gangster
I more unstable that you think
I am bored